Melancholy Sea Wading

Swarmed  by blankets

Drowning in pillows

I swam in a sea of sleep

Tossing and turning

Reaching for something

Flailing and failing

For someone.

Something.

A solid anchor

Asleep beside me.

 

 

He’s been missing for so long

Here in one instance

Gone in the next

It was just the comfort

Something to hold onto

Did it matter if he was the wrong one?

Distance spanned between us

And I realised all was lost

I dropped it into the abyss

Forever gone.

 

Insomnia takes its place

Because the truth is

I don’t like sleeping alone.

 

The aquarium of thoughts

That like fish flitter and delve

Unwelcome are most

Which like piranhas

Expel their unwanted truths

In subconscious bouts

Inescapable

Irrepressible

And yet utterly true.

 

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Dead Yellow Roses

I always get it wrong

Make the wrong decisions

Stay a bit too long

Now my past is made up of

No more than

Dead yellow roses

The ones you used to bring me

Which over time decayed

And died.

Dead Yellow Roses

As dead as the two of us

A memory of a smile

The imprint of your body

Lying next to me

A necessary band aid

Needing to be ripped off

My heart is numb, cold to the core

It feels black

Infected with your anguish

As I said it down the phone.

You were a million miles away

I couldn’t wait

And with that unexpected call

I panicked

And told you

All that I wanted to save

For when you were back home

And not alone.

You can say what you want

To your friends

Take the time you need to heal

Hate me

Curse me

Say what you want

I’ll take this bouquet

Of the past

And let it burn.